Here is a conversation between Julie and I...it will explain a little bit about what is going on...

oh, and BTW... there is something in there that I have never mentioned yet today that is really serious...its about my grandfather...

Webi167: shelby i just read what u commented on my xanga... thank you so much!!!! It made me tear up
wavebabe017: ELF
Webi167: well same to you!!!
Webi167: lol jk
wavebabe017: LMAO
wavebabe017: SORRRY
Webi167: lol its k
wavebabe017: I was trying MYSELF into another biox and u got the elf part of it
Webi167: haha figured
wavebabe017: hehe your very welcome
wavebabe017: im always here
Webi167: awe thanks shleby
Webi167: *hug*
wavebabe017: *huggles*
Webi167: heheh
wavebabe017: omg I am in the BIGEST fight with brittany right now
wavebabe017: grr
wavebabe017: she pisses me off
Webi167: me too man
Webi167: gaaah i cna't stand her anymore
wavebabe017: she is so frickin confusing online and everyday she is getting more and more touchy
wavebabe017: lordy I cant say hi without her flipping out on me
Webi167: have u noticed shes more like into herself?
Webi167: like flirting a LOT
wavebabe017: OMG I KNOW
Webi167: i mena it isn't just me right?
Webi167: shes insane she soo.... like full of herself
wavebabe017: OMG U SHOULD SEE THIS CONVERSATION
wavebabe017: she acts like she knows EVERYTHING
wavebabe017: and she is assuming WAY too much
Webi167: send me it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wavebabe017: its LOOOOOONG
wavebabe017: and confusing
wavebabe017: lol
wavebabe017: but before I send anything I might want to say that my Gpa has cancer and he is going to die soon
wavebabe017: I just found out today
Webi167: oh my god
Webi167: shelby, hunny, omg i'm so sorry
wavebabe017: its alright
wavebabe017: here
wavebabe017 wants to directly connect.
Webi167 is now directly connected.
wavebabe017: wavebabe017: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh
Qtpiexx89: what now?
wavebabe017: brittany have some sympathy
wavebabe017: my grandpas dying
wavebabe017: he will die in like a week
wavebabe017: and theres nothing I can do
Qtpiexx89: sry how the hell was iu supposed to do alls you siad was ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Qtpiexx89: you can't assume i know what is going on
Qtpiexx89: im sry for your loss
Qtpiexx89: i am but it isn't like you would believe me
wavebabe017: whatever... grr and dave doesnt make me feel any better when I spoke to him. he is just so like blah, and well you know I am thinking of just giving up on him altogether. I know that we will NEVER be together and that he wants her and only her. Yeah he told me he likes me but he said not even close to ask much as I like him. Of course he needs to have his ugly fat ass bitch who is unbelievably mean and nasty. He doesnt like me much... not even CLOSE to love...he only put it there for kicks basically
Qtpiexx89: yea ok
Qtpiexx89: i would kill for a guy to be the way dave is to you
wavebabe017: but HES PLAYING AROUND
wavebabe017: he means nothing
wavebabe017: nothing
wavebabe017: I would rather have nothing then what hes doing
wavebabe017: because I know hes getting kciks out of it fooling around with me
Qtpiexx89: i would rather have a guy fool around with me then nothing
wavebabe017: well i wouldnt
wavebabe017: it hurts me brittany
wavebabe017: I want to love and be loved in retun not PLAYED WITH
Qtpiexx89: cuz you know that something is there but it might not be anything big but it is there
wavebabe017: I know somethings there but itll never happen!
Qtpiexx89: shelby you are to young to know what love really is
Qtpiexx89: yea ok
Qtpiexx89: your right
wavebabe017: look he refuses to give up on that shitfaces bitch
Qtpiexx89: nothing is ever going to happen between you to
wavebabe017: i know
Qtpiexx89: cuz you don't have faith
wavebabe017: I DO
wavebabe017: why do you think I try so hard?
Qtpiexx89: no you don't
wavebabe017: I do everything I can to get his attention
wavebabe017: BRITTNY I WAS LIKE SLEPING ON HIM TODAY
wavebabe017: and I had my head on his shoulder
Qtpiexx89: if you had real faith then you wouldn't be saying that nothing is going to happen between you to
wavebabe017: because he has too much faith in tori to even care what I have to feel about him
wavebabe017: he has faith in HER n0ot ME
Qtpiexx89: so that doesn't mean anything
wavebabe017: I am nothing compared to a fat ass ugly ass bitch
wavebabe017: SHE IS SO MEAN TO ME AND HIM
wavebabe017: he doesnt care
wavebabe017: shes ugly and fat
wavebabe017: he doesnt
wavebabe017: as long as shes got the tits
wavebabe017: thats a;ll that matters!
Qtpiexx89: so what if it does
wavebabe017: then my life would suck
Qtpiexx89: no offense but yours aren't all that big and he went out with you
wavebabe017: then there would never ever be anything between us
wavebabe017: BECASUE TORI BROKE YUP WITH HIM
wavebabe017: I was like...aftershcok he was probably desperate
wavebabe017: and you know what he made a bad idea
wavebabe017: I dont even think we Iwent outI
wavebabe017:  it shouldnt be considered going out
wavebabe017: we never went out or anything
wavebabe017: it was nothing
wavebabe017: nothing
wavebabe017: thats what our relatoionship was
wavebabe017: nothing
Qtpiexx89: fine whatever
Qtpiexx89: your right it was nothing
Qtpiexx89: nothing at all
wavebabe017: it was nothing!
Qtpiexx89: you should just be a lez and go looking for hot chicks
wavebabe017: I just want to give up I dont want to suffer anymore
Qtpiexx89: then give up
wavebabe017: i cant stand see him look and talk about tori all the time
wavebabe017: I LOVE  him brittany
wavebabe017: he doesnt know that
wavebabe017: I never said anythoiing to ANYONE
wavebabe017: BUT I LOVE HIM
Qtpiexx89: YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT LOVE IS SHELBY GET IT THROUGH YOU THINK YOU LOVE HIM CUZ YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT LOVE IS
wavebabe017: YES I DO
wavebabe017: YOU ASSUME BRITTANY
Qtpiexx89: NO YOU DON'T
wavebabe017: YOU DONT KNOW
wavebabe017: I DONT KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO WITH OUT HIM
wavebabe017: I WOULD BE LOST
wavebabe017: I WOULD HATE MYSELF
wavebabe017: I WOULDNT HAVE SOMEONE TO TURN TO WHEN I NEED A SHOUDER TO CRY ON LIKE TODAY
wavebabe017: I WOULD PROBABLY BE DEAD BY NOW
wavebabe017: the only reason im alive is because of him
wavebabe017: I was thinking of sucicde a while back
wavebabe017: but he gave me hope
wavebabe017: he is the nicest person I have ever met
wavebabe017: he makes me feel special
wavebabe017: I lvoe being around him
wavebabe017: he always has something positive to say
wavebabe017: and hes the best guy friend I could ever ask for
wavebabe017: I trust him with anything
wavebabe017: I would give my life to him
wavebabe017: I would do anything
wavebabe017: because he has touched me so much in the heart
wavebabe017: that I just cant let him go
wavebabe017: no matter what
wavebabe017: THAT BRITTANY...that is love I feel
wavebabe017: and I dont want that taken away
wavebabe017: but its too fucking bad I cant say it to his face
Qtpiexx89: your right i don't know anything cuz you say im your bestfriend but if i was you would tell me stuff that you tell ali not to tell me
wavebabe017: i didnt tell ali not to tell u anything
Qtpiexx89: and what the fuck suicide
wavebabe017: YEAH BRITTANY I WAS
wavebabe017: I WAS GOING TO
wavebabe017: I HATED MYSELF
Qtpiexx89: no but you tell her things and say don't tell brittany
Qtpiexx89: no offense but you are messed up
wavebabe017: no
wavebabe017: because maybe im not ready to tell you
Qtpiexx89: that is the most selfish thing you could posibly do
wavebabe017: there are times for everything
wavebabe017: BRITTANY WHY DO U THINK I LIKE DAVE SO MUCH
Qtpiexx89: well i guess i will be the last to know
wavebabe017: he made me feel special about myself and whatnot
Qtpiexx89: i always am the last to know
wavebabe017: NO U WONT
wavebabe017: U ARE NOT
Qtpiexx89: yea ok but you will go to dave first then ali then maybe me unless you want to tell anyone else
wavebabe017: WHEN
Qtpiexx89: it always works that way
wavebabe017: I went to Dave first today because of geography
wavebabe017: he was going to come over to help
Qtpiexx89: what the frick
wavebabe017: HE LIVES DOWN THE STREET
Qtpiexx89: geography?!
wavebabe017: YEAH
Qtpiexx89: what dos that have to do with anything
wavebabe017: ITS NOT LIKE U CAN COME HERE ANYWAYS
wavebabe017: I needed ashoulder to cry on
wavebabe017: I called Dave because of that
Qtpiexx89: what does geography have do with it
wavebabe017: and he was too busy taking a shit to talk on the pohone (as his sister says)
wavebabe017: BECAUSE HE CAN COMER OVER TO COMFORT ME
wavebabe017: U CANT
wavebabe017: UR NOT ALLOWED
Qtpiexx89: what the hell does geography have anything to do with anything you are talkikng about?!!!
wavebabe017: I AM TALKING ABOUT TODAY
wavebabe017: I WENT TO DAVE FIRST AND NOT YOU
wavebabe017: IT WAS AN EXAMPLE
Qtpiexx89: w/e
Qtpiexx89: its called a phone
wavebabe017: U WERRE AT CHEERLEADING
wavebabe017: and when I DID call ur mom answered
Qtpiexx89: so you called
Qtpiexx89: so y were thinkg of killing yourself
wavebabe017: BRITTANY IT WAS A WHILE AGO
Qtpiexx89: i am your best friend you should come to me
wavebabe017: I didnt tell ANYONE
Qtpiexx89: shelby stuff like that doesn't go away
wavebabe017: I was having a tough time and well when on the phone I was really upset and dave got it out of me
wavebabe017: it DID go away
wavebabe017: I thought that I had no other reason to live
Qtpiexx89: if you thought of it once you could think of it angian
wavebabe017: but he showed me that there was
wavebabe017: I have you guys and I have him
wavebabe017: it was that family thing
wavebabe017: my whole family hated me and well itlooked as thoughthere was no oneleft to lvoe  me
Qtpiexx89: what happened
wavebabe017: bruittany u already know
Qtpiexx89: i need to know i don't just want to know i need to know
wavebabe017: I TOLD U ALREADY
wavebabe017: when my mom kicked me out of the house my whole family turned their backs on me and I wasnt welcomed ANYWHERE anmore! To add to that, that was when Dave and I were fighting because of the Tori thing ...I just hated my life, I hated my family, I hated myself
Webi167: k
wavebabe017: then she signed off
wavebabe017: she didnt even care about that she just made a lame excuse and signed off
wavebabe017: she thinks she knows everything
wavebabe017: and just because she is my friend I have to tell her everything
wavebabe017: well what if I dont want to tell her everything?!
wavebabe017: because everytime I do she goes and tells EVERYONE ELSE
wavebabe017: when I say "you CAN NOT tell anyone else" she will just be like "I promise I wont" an dthen she run off and mkae posters!
Webi167: Qtpiexx89: no offense but yours aren't all that big and he went out with you
Qtpiexx89: you should just be a lez and go looking for hot chicks

OMG!! WHAT AN ASSHOLE!!!! (sorry i'm inher font lol) What is her fucking problem???? Maybe she should just use what brain cells she has left in thinking that maybe if she wasn't acting like such a bitch u WOULD have told her - she had told me last year sometime that she loved dave... what the crap so 'u don't know the menaing of love' and SHE can??? shelby!!!!!!! shes INSANE!!!!!
wavebabe017: I KNOW!!!!!!!!!
Webi167: WHat is WRONG WITH her???? U want to know why? Its because she knows shes ugly and can't get a guy like dave
wavebabe017: yeah
wavebabe017: have I told u about tori?
wavebabe017: I finally met her
wavebabe017: unfortunately
Webi167: really? shes fat???
wavebabe017: OMG YES
wavebabe017: she is HUGE
wavebabe017: okay hold on..
Webi167: for real?!?!!?
Webi167: k
wavebabe017: think of Jen Wards hair...but WHITE (I think hses albino or sumthing) BUT 10x nastier
wavebabe017: now...
wavebabe017: think of alyssa shiladay about 20 pounds lighter
wavebabe017: picture the biggest bitch in her body
wavebabe017: all that together = tori
Webi167: ARE U SERIOUS???
Webi167: AND HE LOVES HER?!!?!?!?
wavebabe017: YEs
Webi167: EEEE!!!
wavebabe017: HE SAID ToO LETHA
wavebabe017: "I LOVE her"
wavebabe017: ALETHA*
Webi167: oh my golly
wavebabe017: I know
wavebabe017: he LOVCES her
Webi167: is brittany singed off
Webi167: has*
wavebabe017: and D said the same thing as me he was like "she is so fat and ugly"
wavebabe017: yeah shes off
wavebabe017: and she is the msot meanest rudest operson
Webi167: really? what did she say to u?
wavebabe017: I never met the girl and already she was giving me nasty looks and glares every chance she got
wavebabe017: nothing
wavebabe017: she refused to talk to me
wavebabe017: what did I do to deserve the treatment I got?!
Webi167: omg!!
wavebabe017: i know it hurts so bad..
wavebabe017: I spoke to him today and he told me that he still likes me hold on..
wavebabe017: him: I have to get going
ME: wait just one question
him: okay sure shoot
me: do you still like me?
him: yeah
Me: no I mean... like I like you
him: yeah I know what you mean, and the answer is yes
me: oh
him: why?
me: huh?
him: why?
me: I  guess I have been thinking about it lately
him: oh well, I dont like you as much as you like me, not really
me: ...ohh
him: yeah but now Tori is going to eb gone for like 4 days sicne she is going to Pittscug

THE REEST OF THE CONVO WAS ABOUT THE FUCKING BITCH THAT HE TALKS ABOUT ALL THE TIME WITH ME EVEN THOUGH I THINK HE REALIZES THAT IT DOES HURT ME
wavebabe017: today on track and field day he wrote on my shirt "I <3 U    -Dave thomas" and he was probably doing it for kicks
Webi167: i bet u feel like theres nothing ahead for u? gpa, brittnay and dave. Well hun u always got me. And wen life knocks u down u have to get back up and keep fighting. Thats what gives us the strength to carry on. Shelby you have to keep going - i mean i know i'm just assuming but it sounds to me that u are very upset and i don't blame you. U gotta roll with the punches and take it. I'm always here and no matter what brittany or dave says you are one of the greatest ppl that I know. And what i love about u is u keep on fighting. Don't let me down girlfriend - I know u can make it okay?
wavebabe017: yesterday he toook me to his youth group (how I met Tori..that bitch..) and I was basically there to make her jealoud because he likes her more than she likes him, he was USING ME
wavebabe017: OMG JULIE
wavebabe017: I LVOE YOU TO PIECES
wavebabe017: you always know what to say
Webi167: that isn't true
Webi167: it took me a couple minutes to get that out
wavebabe017: lol
wavebabe017: but stilll
wavebabe017: one of the best things I have heard in a while
wavebabe017: no one really talks to me about anything... but Dave does so thats why I always turn to him
wavebabe017: when I tell brittany something she will always be mean about it, she will usually be like "oh boohoo get over it " or "oh please" or "WHAT NOW" and "you are so messed up"
wavebabe017: she couldnt give a rats ass about my problems
Webi167: u remember that okay??? put what i said somewhere wehere u can look at it and remember that ur not the only one in the shadow of lonliness and crap. Cause when u look closer it could be sunlight if you remember that its just another day that happened to bring u down. You;ve got plenty more to bring you back up.
wavebabe017: wow...that was really wise
Webi167: its the truth babe
Webi167: just tellin the truth
wavebabe017: you sound like a professional you know that?
Webi167: now i do
Webi167: lol
wavebabe017: lol seriously
wavebabe017: well anyways
Webi167: but seriously hun, do u promise that u'll get back up?
wavebabe017: I promise
Webi167: well there ya go.
wavebabe017: tomorrow I am just going to ...well I dont know WHAT I am going to do
wavebabe017: but I am going to try and be more psoitive
Webi167: If u want my opinion, just act like u own the world
wavebabe017: lol
Webi167: nothing can bother u because u know that it'll be okay.
wavebabe017: brittany acts like she owns the universe
wavebabe017: shes a dictator
Webi167: haha true true
wavebabe017: I bet its that japanese influence
wavebabe017: shes connedcted with the axis powers
wavebabe017: EVILLLLL
Webi167: and also don't be rude or mean and if brittnay wants to talk or gets in ur face say sumthin like, 'u know... I will find you when I want to talk. Bye!!'
Webi167: lol!!
wavebabe017: lmao good idea
Webi167: and then who will be the bigger person after that?
wavebabe017: muahhahaah...we'll have to see
wavebabe017: but you know..
Webi167: brittany will be all like, 'whatever!' but she'll know that u beat her when it come sot being mature
wavebabe017: I am starting to see a big change in Dave lately. I mean... he doesnt trust me with things much anymore. He wouldnt tell me what him and Aletha were talking about (it was a paper that they were passing back and forth about Tori she asked:

aletha: do you still like Tori? ..god she is being such a bitch today...like usual
Dave: Aletha, I LOVE her
Aletha: oh
Dave: is that a bad thing...?
aletha: *unanswered*

so yeah.... god )
and he wouldnt even tell me! I kind of knew that it was about Tori but he didnt even trust me enough to tell me. HE was never usually like this, but I guess he is trying to keep me out of the way. He really really wants Tori back...he really does. And when I ask him "What do you really see in her?" he will usuallly avoid the question with an excuse like he has to go or the usual "everything about her" when that really menas "I have no clue"
Webi167: exactly
wavebabe017: I am just so confused
wavebabe017: I dont know what to do anymore
Webi167: i wouldn't either. But sometimes thats okay... when u don't know what to do you try evrything you know to make it better and ur bound to either find out what works or find out something about urself. Don't hurt urself in the process though, shelby. You've got to keep fighting, but not necessarily trying to fix everything either (not that u are). Take it easy, pal.
Webi167 is away at 7:40:05 PM.
wavebabe017: thanks Julie, love you...shower time

Auto response from Webi167: bathing... love ya shelby... hang in there girlie

...that, my friend, is a true friend

woohoooo today was track and field day!! lol I was really really really mad at Dave today, and I mean it was just this ugly terrible hatred that had me wanting to rip something apart I was that angry. I wanted nothing more than to say NOTHING to him today, and well I did try to. He kept asking me tp sign his shirt but I juse walked away and that was when he started getting the picture that I was not that pleased with him. I knew something.Something he doesnt want me to know. Yeah it ahs to do with Tori...and well as a matter of a fact- he loves her. Yes, he loves her. Yesterday was the first time I have ever seen Tori in my entire life. From what Dave tells me all the time, I pictures some tall super skinny blonde beauty...haha yeah right. That wasnt even close. (NOW....what I am about to say ((must get my anger out now before I explode that is)) I do not mean in a very bad way...but it has its points and well....if u are offended then I take it all back but I gotta say it sooner or later...u want a description of this girl everyone has been waiting to see? You've got one) I had no idea what I was going to see, and what I saw was pretty shocking. She was an overweight pale pale pale 7th grader with greasy greasy ((if its emphasized then I mean it)) hair that looked like Jen Wards but 10x nastier. She was overweight and was really hanging out of all of her clothes. Her guy and thighs and all. Especially her breasts (I can see why he likes her now...) so there you go. But oh, wait, I forgot one important thing...

she is the most rudest, nastiest, obnoxious person I have ever met in my entire life

Want to know why? ...well lets see here. I walk over and I introduce myself....
me: Hi, you must be Tori, Im shelby
Tori: *snobby look* *turns around and whispers something really mean about shelby (that she can hear because she is right there) and walks away*
...well that is our very nice conversation. The rest of the night, she kept staring at me and whispering little things to her friends and they would crack up histterically. (oh yeah I thought it was SO funny...) They would also try and sit closer and closer to Dave (who had already come and sat down next to me btw) and like shoot evil glares at me as they flirt around with him. They all acted like sluts, pulling offf their shirts with like nopthing on underneath (it was pretty gross when Tori did it because well she does have some WEIGHT...) and throwing virgin bracelets at him...oh yeah I really enjoyed watching that.

well anyways...off that, and back to Track and field day...

SO....I was just so seething angry at Dave (why? ...well I dont think I want to explain ...CURSED HE USED ME....*ahem*)
SO....I had the long jump first thing in the morning (11:30) and I had to drop off my stuff and run to the event to check in. I was jumping against some people who were really really good, but I ended up getting a better score than all of them at first (11,6) and then the second time around I got (11,10) better than anyone...I thought. It turned out that Caitlyen Sullivan kicked my butt with a distance of 12,2 wow... lol well she did deserve it, shes a great athlete.

ANYWAYS....I was sooo excited with my great jump and the second place that I just ran over to Dave and like jumped on him screaming with glory. And after that everything was different and I guess I started talking to him again. A little later, he came and sat down next to me, and I scooched over really really close and I apologized, so he gave me a hug. (haha let me tell you...earlier when I was still mad I DID sign him shirt...I wrote "I hate you" in big letters on the front...oops) but I crossed it out and wrote on the sleeve "I <3 U   -shelby". I then went out to my 100 metes dash...lost...hehe...and then there was my 400 meter relay. We got another second place and it was all good. I watched Dave do Softball throw and he got 4th place, and another 4th place in Long Jump. But he was dissapointed becasue they didnt give ribbons for 4th place...they just announce it.
As we were leaving to the school and go home, Dave pulled out the marker and wrote on my back "I <3 U    - Dave Thomas" and then drew a hamburger (haha becasue the Dave Thomas is the owner of Wendys...hey didnt that guy die?) I thought it was cute...but oh well I am tired

....yeah